masculine energy vs feminine energy
Everyone seems to be talking about the Law of attraction these days and not about God so I’m going to add my 2 cents.
I do believe in the law of attraction. I do believe that everything is a reflection of you and you teach people how to treat you on a moment by moment basis. That doesn’t negate the presence of God in my life.
I also believe in what is called “masculine and feminine energy” it’s a new name for what our mothers knew all along (and my mother had been trying to teach me my whole life)
In order to attract a masculine man, you need to be a feminine woman. That makes sense right? A masculine man is rarely with a masculine woman because then who wears the trousers in the relationship? A man wants someone who is his opposite, someone soft and curvaceous and wanting to submit to his will. This allows him to be a leader. I’ve said it before, for you to be a leader, you need someone to lead.
The Man leads the family, sets the direction and provides the resources to do so. It is a reflection on him that his family is a success because it shows is effectiveness at being a provider, if he can’t provide stability, safety and financially for his family. Then he has failed. Some men unfortunately abdicate this responsibility, but it should be carried with joy because when you start to provide for those you love, you get to think strategically and embrace your masculinity. When all is said and done, what they put on your headstone are the leadership roles you took, Husband, Father, Grandfather.
Meanwhile what the woman’s role in this I’m not so clear on. What the man gets out of it I can understand. However a woman is…receptive? Submissive? Not really understanding it. I listened to a Youtube video where a relationship coach (2 a penny) talked about “accepting the gift honours the giver” this made me think of the British History Podcast- Shoutout to Jamie, where we talk about Anglo Saxon culture where the king was “the giver of rings” that’s actually what the word King means. These rings you would put on your sword to increase its value as metal was a rare commodity in after the fall of the Roman Empire.
The woman’s job is to furnish the structure that the man has provided and make it a home. A man may build a house for his family, but the woman makes the cushions that make it comfortable and not just a stone structure, she provides beauty and serenity and peace. Not just physical beauty, she makes the meals that are the centre of the family time, she births the children, she is the source of hugs and tenderness and vulnerability, which the man so desperately needs after all that strategic thinking, a soft place to land. By being obedient and tender towards her husband, she is using her power to lift him up, honouring him by giving him leave to lead her. Because if she thought she could do a better job, she would. She’d lead. But she believes in her man and that gives him leave to believe in himself. A romanticised version of an eternal truth. Men need constant validation. A feminine woman provides that validation.
So I do see value in that, however as a modern woman I struggle with it because I have been conditioned to not trust men. Growing up, my mum mainly provided for me and that is how I felt. Hence I learnt to be self sufficient because I didn’t have both parents providing a safety net, and a safety net with holes in it doesn’t feel safe. I haven’t seen any relationships where a woman can trust her man implicitly on everything major and he come through. Maybe that is what I need to learn, and maybe us girls need to raise the bar… A LOT. Because the women I’m talking about who have been living precariously for 25+ years are still married to the same half energy men. Teaching their daughters and sons that “crumb energy” is acceptable. For me, I demand better. I don’t hate men. I love men, but I love men who are men, who grab the nettle and embrace the entirety of their masculinity, who truly feel their feelings and experience life. Rather than pick and choose the bits that benefit them and are surprised and in victim mode when a woman does the same to them.
I believe that masculine and feminine compliment each other. I also believe I am truly at my core a feminine woman, someone who wants to be looked after, adored tenderly and cherished. That can only happen from a man who is willing to provide emotional stability and love in the purest form. That is rare and hard to find. Couple that with my need to be attracted to the man in question, and I’ve got my work cut out but I do believe I will get there. I know he’s out there, praying for me to come into his life.
I also believe in modern dating we are being conditioned to accept not what we truly want, but what is available. A modern man has so many hoops a woman should jump through to be considered “high value” and then earn his respect that it is exhausting and actually you don’t need the respect of people who never truly want to give it. Meanwhile the modern woman’s standards have dropped through the floor, essentially all a man needs to provide is dick and hopefully his last name. But not even necessarily that. I demand better, not just for me, but for my daughters and for their daughters too. Standards need to improve. If she’s got money, beauty, intelligence and personality, what is she doing with you? Mr Misogyny living with his mother with no money or success. This “women like it rough or bit on the side” fantasy is exactly that, a fantasy, it happens to 1% of men like you and you aren’t that 1% sweetie. Ladies, if you are looking for a man with a six pack and the last time you saw a gym was in year 11 then that too is a problem. If you want an intelligent man and you can’t string a sentence together, look at yourself first before you say “why don’t guys like me” that is what all this focus on masculine and feminine energy does, it is there to focus us on ourselves first. Look to our own sins before looking outwards.
I should say that Masculine and Feminine energy depends on the people in question and not every man is masculine and not every woman is feminine. What I don’t like is trying to make every woman into a feminine woman. Its not for everyone, nor is being a masculine man for every man. Some men do need to be led because they aren’t leaders. Telling them to lead is setting them up to fail. That’s why feminism became a thing, because some women and children starved because of men’s foolishness, can you imagine being married to an alcoholic pre women’s rights? It’s literally a death sentence because he’ll spend all his money on his addiction and none on feeding you and the kids. Hence you needed to go out to work and have the right to earn equal pay if you did. Some women aren’t there to “honour her man with her supplication” because she was a born leader and its repressing her. You need to do you. I however am feminine, I like to be vulnerable and tender and soft. So modern society forcing me to be a go-getter who is there to earn big bucks and provide for my family is not in my nature. I’m 30 and I’m exhausted after doing it for less than 10 years. I really just want to be the kind of mum and wife who gets to eat dinner with her family every day. That’s my luxury item. I do get to provide for my family, a nurturing environment with empowerment to grow and be their best selves. Same for my husband. Not everyone is going to be the main character, some people have supporting roles. That’s okay. As long as you are the main character in your own story, then you are fine as you are. Don’t let masculine or feminine bamboozle you. If you are a strong person. You need to find someone you can be vulnerable with. If you are a tender hearted person, you need to find a protector. All I can ever advocate is that you find your own true love.
Grace and Courage.
Annetta Mother-Smith.