God hates me

Yeah I may be late to the party. Not only did he make me black, female, short with mental health issues, he is now apparently actively against me.

Everything I do, everything I desire is heinous to God. So he must hate me. I’m tired of preaching. I’m tired of being preached at being told that the modern version of Christianity is the only way it’s ever been. People used the same bible to stone people for adultery, keep slaves, and cut off people’s hands for stealing. But apparently me pointing out someone wronged me is revenge? Which makes me a bad person? Someone in need of ministry?

There’s a passage for everything.

My trials in life have been numerous, but I feel very much like someone who has had air forced back into her lungs. It’s painful but it’s life sustaining. The pain will pass and I will learn how to breathe again. But it also makes me appreciate every single thing. Life is so precious. So valuable that someone who seeks to destroy a miracle 31 years in the making must be stopped. No one wins if we all lose.

I’m tired of fighting.

Either see my point or don’t. Either way God will either shield you from this life, or he will give you the experience that gives you wisdom to understand what I am doing. I will not be prophesied to in part… to quote 1 Corinthians 13 vs 10.

May God ensure it’s the former

Grace and Courage

Annetta Mother Smith