Do onto others?

Hypothetical scenario

My youngest (girl) cousin on my mum’s side is 16. I am 33. She wants to be a doctor. The last Dr in the family the entire family rallied round, and paid to put through medical school. Mum paid her school fees of between £24,000-£30,000 (I think its £30k I think the £24k figure is cap) Almost all those people are retired now. And will have retired by the time this youngest one wants to go to medical school. My mum plain and simple doesn’t want to do it. I can’t blame her, its a lot of money.

Providing I am unmarried (in which it will be a joint decision, but would still happen) I am in a financial position to pay for tuition, if the family can put up the living costs. As long as she doesn’t study in the UK or USA.

I have flatly refused to pay for her brother’s £3k laptop because the laptop I write to you on is under £200. And his dad didn’t call me when my dad died.

I have always foresworn against the family madness. The reason I was mad about the previous Dr being funded was her dad had the money, he just drank it and expected everyone else to love his daughter more than him and turns out they did.

This uncle however isn’t a drunk, he just makes an honest living that cannot cover medical school, which is common for at least 90% of the global population of fathers.

Here is the rub.

The rub isn’t that I swore no more “Sierra Leone madness” when it came to my family.

The rub isn’t that I can’t afford to change her life because actually, I can.

The rub is actually when my father died her father is my uncle (my mother’s brother) and even when cussed out it wasn’t enough to make him call me. Ever. His wife called. But him? The actual blood relative who should have shown some concern for his sister’s child who lost her father who he witnessed with his own eyes how much love there was between us? Yeah he had no concern. Not even a mite.

So now is it right if I don’t change his daughter’s life over a phone call that should have happened 3 years ago?

I don’t know. I don’t know if that’s petty or if its justice. Because his actions say he doesn’t care about me, why should I care about him? £24,000 is a big commitment to make for someone whose father has done absolutely nothing for you, and the one time he could have shown, love care and concern for his niece….he didn’t. £30k is even more so… To put ones life on hold to change another’s. By the way even if I gave this money it wouldn’t mean that I would receive more contact with him. I may get an initial “thank you,” but no more than that. And that my loves isn’t worth 30 bands.

We shall see. I don’t think I will be first to volunteer, but I pray to God I will find it in my heart to be kind enough to say that the sins of the father should never impact the daughter.

Grace and Courage.

Annetta Mother Smith.